Jas

theconcealedweapon

Some people can lift 200 pounds. But if they carried it everywhere they went for an entire day without ever putting it down, they’d severely tear their muscles and cause permanent damage to their body.

Some people can enter a 140° car in the summer to get something out of the car. But if they stayed in the car, they’d die from the heat.

Some people can hold their breath underwater for 30 seconds. But if they tried to go scuba diving without the necessary gear, they’d drown.

Clearly, someone doing something for a short period of time does not automatically mean that they can do it indefinitely with no problem.

So why do people assume that if someone can walk for a few seconds, they don’t need a wheelchair?

chronicallyinvisible

Clearly, someone doing something for a short period of time does not automatically mean that they can do it indefinitely with no problem.

phoenixonwheels

This whole obsession with wheelchair users struggling on foot down the aisle at their wedding or across the stage for graduation is 100% powered by ableism.

phoenixonwheels

“The heartwarming story of how one woman worked for 8 months straight so she could escape the horror that is being in wheelchair for a few short minutes to struggle slowly and painfully down the aisle on her special day.”

feraladoration

“the horror that is being in a wheelchair” bitch it’s hella better than struggling slowly & painfully down the aisle ffs

phoenixonwheels

“Despite being permanently paralyzed, her one goal since her accident has been to walk across the stage for graduation. The whole crowd gave her a standing ovation and broke into tears when she dragged her paralyzed legs across the stage with the help of leg braces and a walker to collect her diploma, after which she immediately sat back down in her wheelchair, which she will use to move around for the rest of her life.”

How the hell is this an inspirational story? This person needs better goals. And a therapist.

smoldragonborn

They’re toxic in an even greater way because as a disabled person, I didn’t realise till I was reading this how much I had internalised that. I genuinely have had feelings of fear and shame about using a chair or a walker if I get married. And why? Because I’m constantly seeing “heartwarming” stories about disabled people who shed their mobility aids for that moment. Why the hell am I afraid of using them to get married? Anyone who marries me or attends the wedding will know I need them and love me regardless.

Bless this post for making me realise I’d internalised that shit.

3-ducks-in-a-trenchcoat

These types of stories teach people, both abled and disabled, that using mobility aids, especially wheelchairs, is inferior.

margomoment

here are some beautiful brides in chairs with dresses they ROCK. I know a lot of disabled ppl with internalized ableism think they “won’t look good” if they use their chair, but here’s some literally gorgeous gals for ur consideration

(that last ones cute as fuck and i teared up at it)

phoenixonwheels

Who needs a bouquet when you can be a bouquet?

smoldragonborn

I made my addition to this post in June 2019. Its now January 2020 and I no longer feel guilty about the idea of going down the aisle one day with mobility aids.

God bless the disabled community, y'all saved me from some internalised bullshit

thegayemu

This post floated by a few months ago, and I remember something to effect of there’s a difference between recovery and refusal. That is, like, I have a friend that suffered an incomplete spinal cord injury. He can walk again now, and I don’t think I’ve seen him use his chair in a few years. When he walked at his graduation, it was to show off his recovery. That he wasn’t quite ready to go through a full day upright, but he could walk across a stage, unassisted, and soon he would be able to do that every day. There’s also a difference in someone like me choosing to not use a mobility aid. My mobility is intensely fluid, especially seasonally. So, I would plan a summer wedding. And while I love my cane it can also be the biggest pain in my ass, so I’d want to just go unassisted. But that’s normal for me, at least right now. I can walk without an aid during about half of the year. It’s reasonable to assume I can make it through one day without it. All of that is different than someone that is fully and permanently paralyzed, that will never walk again, dragging themselves along because they feel that’s somehow better. Overall though, my biggest takeaway is fuck the media. Because disabled people should be able to make whatever decision they want without the media turning it into this grand inspirational story.

phoenixonwheels

Disabled people should be able to make whatever decision they want without the media turning it into this grand inspirational story.

THIS.

bifinmediasres

Couldn’t pass up the opportunity to add my disabled joy to this post. Look at this love!

aprillikesthings

Taking the opportunity to add these photos of Jessica Kellgren-Fozard and her wife Claudia, from this twitter post. Jessica also has a youtube channel that’s primarily about disability and chronic illness and LGBT stuff (it’s amazing!)